How to Help a Victim

How to Help a Victim/Survivor of Domestic/Dating Violence

• Ask direct questions gently.
• Listen without judging.
• Let the victim know how you can support him/her.
• Explain that physical violence in a relationship is never acceptable, at any time.
• Make it clear that the victim/survivor is not alone.
• Let the victim/survivor know that it is likely that the violence will continue and will likely escalate.
• Provide assistance to the victim, which you are comfortable and equipped to help with.
• Provide information about local resources, such as support groups and victim services programs.
• Be understanding and supportive.
• Encourage the victim/survivor to report incidents of domestic and dating violence to local law enforcement, campus security, a mental health professional, or a trusted friend.
  
  

Ways to Help a Victim/Survivor of Sexual Assault

• Encourage the victim to seek medical attention in a timely manner.
• Encourage the victim/survivor to talk about the assault(s) with an advocate, a mental health professional, or someone they trust.
• Encourage the victim to report the incident to campus security or law enforcement.
• Listen without judging.
• Let them know the assault(s) was not their fault.
• Let them know they did what was necessary to prevent further harm.
• Reassure the victim/survivor that he or she is cared for and loved.
• Let them know that they do not have to manage this crisis alone.
• Important information to ask:
  
  • Are you hurt?
  • Do you need a doctor?
  • Do you want me to call for medical services?
  • Would you like to report the assault to the proper authorities?
    
    

Ways to Help a Victim/Survivor of Stalking

• Don’t minimize the situation.
• If the victim/survivor is showing signs of strain, let him/her know what you notice about his/her behavior and express your concern.
• Encourage the victim/survivor to keep a record of what has been happening.
• Don’t investigate the situation. If a formal investigation needs to happen, you may inadvertently compromise that investigation.
• Help the victim/survivor preserve evidence and keep records.
• Be aware if you start to feel that you must become the victim/survivor’s bodyguard. Consider consulting with VAWPP if this is happening.
• Do not confront the stalker—this can backfire and escalate the situation, putting the victim/survivor or yourself at risk. Do not make this about you.
• If you have been the target of a similar situation, your experience may help. The victim/survivor’s reaction may differ, as well as his/her choices, but knowing that he/she isn’t alone can be helpful in itself.
• Do the research to find out the resources and options, if the victim/survivor wants help.
• If you haven’t been the target of a similar situation, you can listen and then learn more about the situation.
• Consider referring the victim/survivor to a confidential and supportive resource like VAWPP.